The KitchenMaid

Easy chilli chocolate pretzel sandwiches for the knackered Christmas cook

It’s the most wonderful time of the year, right? Replace wonderful with exhausting and you might be more on to it. A few weeks ago I decided I was going to give myself the Christmas gift of Doing Less. I haven’t been able to open this present just yet, but I’m hoping today’s the day.

I’m a bit of a self-harmer during the festive season, to be honest. I know I don’t have gas left in the tank to Do All The Things For All The People but that doesn’t stop me from offering. I do try to cut a few corners where I can though.

This year I’ve shelved Christmas baking for a bit of un-baking instead. This recipe is brilliant because you don’t need anything particularly fancy, there’s no tortuous icing or rolling out of dough, and people go mad for the results. If that still sounds like too much work for the last few days before Christmas, rest assured that the slightly heart-shaped pretzels make these appropriate for Valentine’s Day too. It’s good to create the illusion that you’re getting ahead, right?

CHILLI CHOCOLATE PRETZEL SANDWICHES

If you want to skip the chilli and the alcohol, make sure you add a teaspoonful of good vanilla extract instead. These can be stored in an airtight container in the fridge for up to a week after making. To make these dairy-free, use coconut cream and coconut oil in place of the cream and butter.

  • 125g good quality dark chocolate, roughly chopped
  • ¼ cup cream
  • 2 Tbsp butter
  • 1 Tbsp rum, brandy, whisky or a liqueur of your choice (optional)
  • 100g bag of pretzels (about 60 pretzels)
  • Flaky sea salt
  • Chilli flakes

Put the chocolate, butter, cream and rum into a small pot and set over very low heat, stirring often, until melted. Stir well, then pour into a small bowl and chill in the fridge until firm but not rock-hard (about 45 minutes).

Line a baking tray or large plate with baking paper or foil. Take a small teaspoonful of the chocolate mixture and use it to sandwich two pretzels together. If the chocolate mixture has set too much, let it sit at room temperature until it softens. Repeat with the remaining mixture and pretzels. Store in a covered container in the fridge. Sprinkle with flaky sea salt and chilli flakes before serving. Makes 30 chocolate pretzel sandwiches.

Mere Kirihimete everyone. Be careful and kind out there, see you in 2022!

Homecooked – seasonal recipes for everyday

Hungry? Here’s something I prepared earlier – now fully cooked and ready to share. Ta-dah!

If you’ve been wondering why I’ve been pretty absent from this blog for the last year, this is the reason (it turns out juggling writing a book with a family and a full-time job is quite time-consuming). Homecooked is a collection of seriously cookable recipes for every New Zealand season and every occasion.

Obviously I can’t talk about it with any objectivity, but the press release says it’s “beautiful, honest and useful”, which is exactly what I want a cookbook with my name on the front to be. It’s been an absolute labour of love (plus many, many late nights, early mornings, and copious amounts of Whittaker’s 72% Dark Ghana Chocolate).

Roasted nectarines and beetroot with watercress and burrata

I wrote all 65,000 words of Homecooked, but I had a lot of help in making it happen. Enormous thanks to Claire Murdoch at Penguin NZ for understanding my love for honest, useful home cooking and encouraging me to bring it to life with the aid of her incredible team. Heartfelt thanks too to Evie Kemp for the stunning cover and illustrations.

Homecooked would be nothing without the work of Carolyn Robertson, who did the gorgeous photographs and styling. I basically moved in with Caro and her family over the summer, completely upending their kitchen renovation plans and forcing her to spend a lot of time at tip shops looking for props. Not only is she massively talented, she is also a saint with a great taste in bad 90s music. When we first worked together at the Waikato Times nearly 20 years ago we often dreamed up mad schemes and plans. I think this exceeds all of them!

Double peanut brownie cheesecake

Homecooked is a book about food but to me it’s also a book about whānau near and far. I couldn’t have written it without mine – and I hope it encourages you to cook for yours. It’s available now from all good booksellers in Aotearoa (or try Book Depository if you’re further afield).

Broken biscuit slab with easy chocolate ganache

On Friday, in an attempt to be an engaged and entertaining home schooling parent, I brightly asked my daughter if she’d like to do some baking. Actually, I asked her twice (never mind Covid-19, my research has shown that there is a pandemic of selective deafness occurring among tweens). Eventually she looked up from her book and said disinterestedly, ‘no, I just want to eat some baking’. I couldn’t argue with that logic.

If you feel a bit the same, here’s a no-bake slice that you can put together with all the broken biscuits at the bottom of the tin. I made this one with some kindly gifted Lotus Biscoff biscuits, but you could just as easily use Superwines, Krispies, Malt biscuits or anything in that genre. If you don’t have quite enough biscuits, add a little more coconut. Or use a little bit less butter. 

If you’ve got a food processor, bung the biscuits in there and pulse to biggish crumbs. Alternatively, put the biscuits in a solid plastic bag and bash them with a can, a rolling pin or a bottle of wine. This can be quite therapeutic, as long as the bag doesn’t come undone…

SPICED BROKEN BISCUIT SLAB WITH CHOCOLATE GANACHE ICING

  • 100g butter
  • 1/2 a tin (about 3/4 cup) condensed milk
  • 325g plain sweet biscuits, bashed to large crumbs (keep a few big pieces in there for texture)
  • 1 cup desiccated coconut
  • 1 tsp ground ginger 
  • 1 tsp mixed spice
  • Finely grated zest of an orange
  • 1 Tbsp freshly squeezed orange juice
  • For the ganache
  • ½ cup cream
  • 125g dark chocolate, roughly chopped

Line a 20 x 25cm tin (or thereabouts) with baking paper, leaving enough overhanging the sides that you can use to pull it out later.

Melt the butter and condensed milk together over low heat in a large pot. Let cool briefly, then tip in the biscuits, coconut, spices, most of the orange zest and the orange juice. Stir to mix, then tip into the prepared tin. Press down (the overhanging paper will help here) to smooth the top. Put in the fridge.

Wipe out the pot and pour in the cream. Set over very low heat. As soon as it bubbles, remove from the heat and add the chopped chocolate. Stir until smooth, then pour over the chilled base. Sprinkle over the remaining orange zest. Leave to set in the fridge (to speed things up) for about 20 minutes before slicing into small bars. Store in an airtight container in the fridge. Be warned, it will disappear quickly!

Easy mulled apple tea with honey and bay

About a month ago we went mad and had a Matariki party. ‘Bring your kids,’ we told our friends, then winced as we realised there were going to be nearly as many people under 15 in our house as there were adults. This is why I spent the next day cleaning children’s muddy footprints off my bedroom walls, though how they got there I’m still not sure. At least the adults were well-behaved.

To get everyone into the winter party spirit I made mulled wine for the first time in about two decades, mixing together apple juice, red wine, spices and a large amount of sugar. It was certainly a party-starter, but it also felt like a headache waiting to happen. This less-sweet, no-alcohol version is much gentler. Use a really good apple juice (I am a big fan of Mela Juice, made from 100 per cent New Zealand apples) for best results.

Easy mulled apple tea with honey and bay

It’s easy to increase or decrease the quantities for this as needed. If you’re planning a party and want to get ahead, make the mulled apple tea as described below and store in the fridge for up to a week. Reheat to simmering point to serve.

2 cups apple juice

2 cups water

2 rooibos tea bags (or ordinary black tea)

1 cinnamon stick

2 bay leaves

1-2 whole star anise (an aniseed-like star-shaped spice)

1 Tbsp honey (add more to taste)

Put all the ingredients into a small saucepan set over medium heat. Bring to a simmer, then remove from the heat and let stand for five minutes. Remove the teabags and decant into a jug. Pour into heatproof glasses to serve. Makes 1 litre.

A taste of autumn: simple plum and chipotle sauce

If you’re lucky, you’ll have memories of your parents or grandparents pickling and preserving up a storm at this time of year. My mother wasn’t a great jam-maker, but she made a killer tomato sauce that we all remember fondly, probably more so because the recipe has been lost to history. Modern food culture makes preserving summer’s bounty less necessary than it used to be, but it’s still a fun thing to do. Making smaller batches – and using a few convenient shortcuts – means you can pickle or preserve after work rather than having to set aside a whole weekend. Put in a little time and energy now and your investment will pay off in the cold, damp months ahead.

LIFE-PRESERVING TIPS
Follow these golden rules if you want your preserving efforts to be successful: 

  1. Measure everything carefully, especially the weight of fruit and vegetables, sugar and vinegar.
  2. Make sure all utensils, equipment and jars or bottles are scrupulously clean. Wash jars and lids in hot soapy water (or run them through a dishwasher), then heat jars in a 120C oven for 20 minutes. Put lids in a heatproof bowl and cover with boiling water, then dry thoroughly and use while still hot.
  3. Store the finished product carefully: if you’re not confident that you’ve sealed a jar or bottle properly, store the preserve in the fridge and eat within two weeks. Don’t chance a bubbling brew!

TANGY PLUM AND CHIPOTLE SAUCE
Makes about 1 litre ‌

Is a barbecue sausage really a barbecue sausage without a splash of homemade plum sauce on the side? This one uses pre-prepared chipotle peppers in adobo sauce (look for them in the ‘Mexican’ section at the supermarket) to give it a little more kick. While it’s magic with a traditional pork sausage, this tangy sauce also goes well with deep-fried tofu or in a cheese toasted sandwich. It can be used immediately, but the flavours will deepen over time.

  • 500g plums (about 4-5 large Fortune plums), stoned and roughly chopped
  • 750g onions, peeled and sliced
  • 5cm piece fresh ginger, roughly‌ ‌chopped‌ ‌
  • 4‌ ‌cloves garlic, peeled and roughly chopped
  • ½ cup sultanas
  • 2 cups vinegar (white wine or malt)
  • 6 chipotle peppers in adobo sauce (about ½ a 200g tin)
  • 1 packed cup brown sugar
  • 2 ½ Tbsp salt
  • 1 Tbsp turmeric
  • 1 Tbsp five-spice powder
  • 1 Tbsp smoked paprika

Put the plums, onions, ginger, garlic and sultanas in a large, heavy pot with 1 cup of the vinegar. Simmer over medium heat, stirring occasionally, for about 30 minutes or until the plums and onions are very soft. Transfer to a food processor (or use a stick blender in the pot) and add the chipotle peppers. Puree until smooth. Return to the pot and add the sugar, salt, spices and remaining 1 cup vinegar. Simmer over low heat for 20-30 minutes, until thickened (remember it will thicken further as it cools). Leave to cool, then pour into sterilised sauce bottles. Cap tightly and store in a cool, dark place.  ‌‌